Fast forward to 1996 and the Dragons had a young team that were there or there abouts at the start of the year, but then managed to win something like 11 games in a row in the second round, fang their way into the semis, only to be beaten by a Beaver Menzies/Geoff Toovey inspired eagles team, who rode a wave of fucked up refereeing calls, including MAtt Ridge being called held, before standing up and running 90 metres to set up a try, to another devastating victory over the Dragons.
In 1999 the battle of my heart and geographical location came to an end as St George merged with Illawarra to create some sort of super team consisting of the biggest Doogie Shralpers from the respective sides. After taking a while to get their shit together, they looked the goods, took down the Storm convincingly in the first of the semis and fanging their way into the GF with a series of convincing victories. What happened next is now modern day folk lore, as the Dragons streaked away to a half time lead that seemed unassailable by those cocks in the purple of Melbourne. However as fate would have it the Dragons once again lost their mind bombing tries and giving away a penalty try at the death to lose by a measely two points. Looking back this was probably the worst day of my young life up to that point, as i received a barrage of phone calls and messages to make my soul crumble like a couple of dry weetbix. It was worse for some, including my co bloggers own father who was not seen by hi loved ones for 2 and a half weeks after the traumatic experience.
For the next ten years i continued to look forward to each season with a renewed faith that this year would in fact be their time. During this period, i had my first kiss, graduated high school, got major facial surgery, had my heart broken on several occasions, saw some boobs, got some tubes and am just about to graduate with my second university degree, though the Dragons never again fought their way to a premiership decider.
This is the type of disappointment, regret and devastation that would take the heart of most men, yet the Dragons supporters are a resilient bunch and again my hope was restored with the greatest coach of the modern era Wayne Bennet himself in charge things looked up and as they toiled, fought and plundered their way to the minor premiership i must admit i was beguiled into thinking this could finally be the year. However as i'm sure you have all now recognised it was once more little more than a fools hope.
With the grand final two insignificant wins away the losers once again fell short, becoming the first minor premiers ever not to make the third week of the finals and in doing so dashing all my dreams and sending my into a neg spiral that i can confidently say inspired what was my worst and most upsetting week of the year. Here are a couple of things about the Dragons two match finals campaign that really made me lose my mind, so much so i only got it back today.
1- Playing the Red hot Parramatta Eels two weeks in a row
What the frig, this team decides they are going to be the men in the run to the finals, while the Dragons, assured of a top 3 finish take their foot off the steam and lose two in a row. The teams meet in the last regular season game, with not too much on the line as the Bulldogs only have to beat the lowly Tigers to claim the minor premiership. The Dragons belt an under strength Eels with former Preset fag touch team reject Justin Poore having a blinder. The dogs go down, we win the minor premiership, while the Eels loss means they slip to eighth. That sets up a second date with the Eels, at the same venue, with a grand final qualifier at stake. The first place team had only ever lost to eighth one sine the inception of the 8 team final series. However with the same effectiveness of two ex lovers trying to rekindle a long dormant romance, the dragons barely got into second gear and went down like bitches.
90 Meter Intercept Try
With parra on the ropes, and down by two the Dragons run one of their pet left side plays. After off loading short to Ben Creagh several times previously Hornby opts for the second man option. Soward takes the ball and spots space out wide, firing the ball to an unmarked Brett Morris, the competitions leading try scorer. Enter Eric Growth Jr. Growth is a full on cock face. He took this intercept ran the full length of the field and sealed the deal for his side. To make matters worse, last year while struggling with form last year Growth claimed he only played this glorious game at the top level and his true love was being some sort of guitar hero. GET FUCKED. Could you imagine what this blatant footy bogan from western city would be into when it come to playing music, i would be my right nipple that his favourite band is Creed or
Nickle Back or some shit equally as abhorrent. I couldnt find his try, but here is what it led to
Finals System of Death
So while the Dragons lost, they still had a second chance in the finals. However due to some fucked up reasoning by the douche who formulated the current NRL finals system, despite coming first in the regular season, this 26 weeks counted for nothing as the Dragons were forced to travel to the elephant grave yard for NSW team, Lang Park. Bennet has never won a game there and this shit continued, imagine how much more confident our boys would have been running out to be greeted by a sea of red and White, rather than being confronted by banjo playing, Four ex swilling Queensland fuckers who would prefer to die than see their team get beaten by a team from south of the border.
eApocalyptic text messages
late in the season the Dragons went on an 8 game winning streak and looked absolutely bullshit. I was pumped and why wouldnt i be as things were looking the best they possibly could. Then started the text messages. My fellowe blogger started getting ahead of himself claiming the Dragons were certainties, as Wollongong dancing with the stars contestant James Dixon accurately claimed he was claiming with the certainty of Andrew Voss that the dragons "would win the premiership". I tried to curb this destructive behaviour with warnings of the potential despair that awaited us, yet this only encouraged him. I received messages day and night for 3 weeks straight about the premirship being ours, hopefully next time he will think twice before tapping those flurescent keys.
Nathan Friend or Fien or some bullshit
In his infinite wisdon Wayne Bennet decided that despite having regular hooker Dean Young and premiership winning back up Luke Pridis in the wings that we needed to buy another hooker. Fien, a reject from the Warriors (who failed to once again even crack the top 8) was naturally his choice. Despite leading the Kiwis to an unlikely world cup victory, i am convinced he is the worst buy in the history of Rugby League. Since he arrived at the club the side barely won a game and with his streaky passes, slow dummy half service, tendancy to fall of tackles and a kicking game that is only matched by the complete absurdity of his hair cut, i hope he never plays another game in the famous red and white as long as he breathes.
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