For those of you who are unaware, M@tz0r is the alter ego of the infamous Matt Leslie. I attended Woonona High School from 2001-2004 with Matt and watched him partake in many social activities including getting fruit thrown all over him by the whole Geography class is year 10, get accused of stalking people on MSN messenger by the whole of year 9 and I also witnessed him acting as a peeping tom in the PE change rooms as my friend Aaron Lewis got changed in what he thought was a sechluded space, only to find out that Matt was peeping around the corner at him.
I left school in year 10 and so did most of my friends (hey it is Woonona and we are destined to a lifetime full of Tradie work, Rapping verses on hip hop CD's for the 1.7. S0ulj@hz and smoking Ice in Bellambi basements). We didn't see eachother much and this was pre Myspace days and in the midst of MSN. So anyway Myspace blows up and everyone is going crazy on it. James Dixon is lurking pro bodyboarder Ben Players cousin somehow and ends up masturbating over her, Declan McMullen is running the profile name "Panic at the Sweatbox!" and somehow Matt Leslie has transformed into fucking M@tz0r.
I was shocked, appauled to an extent, to see that "M@tz0r" as he was now known, was sending out 100 bulletins a day claiming he was this hot cunt/skateboard/hardcore/tattooist hellman and that chicks from all over the interweb were actually digging him. Myself and a group of close friends (excluding Australis next top model loser Rebecca Jobson, who secretly wanted to give matzor a blozza and probably did) were disgusted that we were the only ones who could see that M@tz0r was a massive dork and was somehow pulling the wool over these chicks eyes. Even Harriet "I'm a pretentious food enthusiast" Spark has admitted to me that she thought M@tz0r was a total babe.
So anyway shit got real crazy when M@tz0r and his group of goons D@nz0r, Br@dz0r and THAT J@YMZ GUY didn't enjoy people such as myself and James Dixon writing them off on the internet (fuck we're so tough behind keyboards). I don't know how but That Jaymz Guy ended up pulling some massive rig of a girlfriend who James Dixon used to wank over on a daily basis whilst trawling her profile pictures, while M@tz0r just ended up with a body covered in hideous scene tattoos. Aaaaaanyway, Declan, Dicko and myself were going real crazy on matzor because we couldnt believe how much of a Douchebag he was so we decided to show Patrick Woodley who matzor was. Pat got real offended when he seen Matzor pics so he decided shit had gone too far and made this myspace group.....
http://groups.myspace.com/ireallydontlikemAtz0r
Suffice to say, M@tz0r was abit upset when he read this description of the group
This is a club of little restrictions. We simply ask one thing, one very easy thing. What is this little thing I hear you say? Of course it is to kinder some deep kind of discontent for the one who is called M@tz0r (Or as I am lead to believe, the artist formerly known as M@tz0r).
For those unaware of the evils of the excuse for a human, let this group proclaim his foul doings and share them amongst the broader community, as to greater understand the workings of a member of the infamous S.D.F.C.
Feel free to join and let all the M@z0r hate within you be cast upon this page. This a page for all of you who don't meet the rigorous style requirement of M@tz0r and fail to give a flying fuck!
Pretty good stuff I think. M@tzor went pretty skitz when he read this and got his boiz da S.D.F.C. to pounce on me next time he seen me out (why the fuck does everyone wanna bash me? I'm not that bad...)
Anyway this blog is pretty pointless but it just made me laugh when I looked at all the old myspace pictures of matzor and remembered all the laughs he gave us.
Fair enough matzor is a douche but im pretty sure he JOISTED THAT MANY babes in his heyday so I'm backing him for that. He definitely got the last laugh on Declan Mcmullen by hooking up with Declans current girlfriend and ex girlfriend before dec had even layed a finger on them. BANG!
Here's a few pics of matzor in his myspace glory days....
And here is a MYSPACE BULLETIN Declan posted about M@tz0r back in the day....
One space to rule them all, One space to find them, One space to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
The One space was created by the Dark Lord Z0ron during the Second Age in order to gain dominion over the free peoples of MySpace. In disguise as Annatar, or "Lord of Gifts", he aided the Elven smiths of Wollongong and their leader Tom in the making of the MySpaces of power. He then forged the One Space himself in the fires of Mount Doom (aka woo town). He intended it to be the most powerful of all Spaces, able to rule and control the others (as long as their owners beleived all the shit he was spinning about how much of a bab/model/poet/ladykiller/didimentionbabe). Since the other spaces were extremely powerful, Z0ron was obliged to place most of his native power, life force and will into it to effect his purpose (aka fashion tips, ego and babe pulling powers). As a side effect of this, as long as the Space existed, it was impossible to remove him from the mortal plane. The risk to Sauron was that if he were to lose his myspace, he would also lose a great deal of his own power, and if the Space were to be destroyed, perhaps even his life.
The space appeared to be made of simple gigabytes, photos backgrounds and songs, but due to the vast power within it and the vastness of his own ego, it was impervious to damage from any feeble attacks of 16 year old boys. It could only be destroyed by eroding the fan base and followers, where the source of the power originated from. Like the lesser spaces forged by the other humans as "places to pick up babes for our contest" ) it bore no style, charisma or originality, but its identity could be determined by a simple (though little-known) test: when written off, it displayed a fiery Tengwar inscription in the Black Speech of Mordor. The lines were later taken up into a rhyme of lore describing the spaces, but they were evidently part of the spell that imbued the One space with power, since the humans heard Z0ron utter the same words during the Spaces creation whereupon they denied his friend request and foiled his plan.
Part of the nature of the space was that it slowly but inevitably corrupted its owner, regardless of any intentions to the contrary. Whether this effect was specifically designed into the spaces magic or is simply an artefact of its evil origins is unknown. (Z0ron might be expected to endow his One MySpace Page with such a property, but he probably never intended anyone besides himself to update it.) For this reason the Wise, including declan, pat, morgan and kade, refused to wield it in their own defence, but instead determined that it should be destroyed.
it was left up to the brave fellowship to destroy the dark lord of MySpace by the only manner they new how, cast the one space of power in to the fiery abyss where it was formed. Things have now been set in motion that cant be undone, but if the once broken alliances of myspace can be reforged there is still hope yet, if only a fools hope, that this evil can finally be cast from our lives.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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